Antaray in Inday..

Inday

Overnight, inaral ng amo ni Inday ang Dictionary para may pang tapat na siya kay inday.

Amo: So inday, tell me, how do you accept the fact that you are just a mere chaimbermaid in this extravagant mansion?

Inday: Una camarera? eres tan pathetic. La unica razon que inscribi tu cas es porque nada esta sucediendo de tu casa cuasi-agradalbe. Quisiera traer una poca clase en este gogar pero conjeturo que no puedo porque eta casa es fea.

Amo: WHAT???!!! (nosebleed)












Not a filipino and can't relate? Please use the google translator on the upper right side of this page.

Gustong kwan..

Tatay: Hon...gusto ko...pwede ba? 

Nanay: Oo ba! tutal, inaantok na ang mga bata 

Tatay: Junior anak...isara mo muna ang mga bintana 

Junior: (Hikab....antok...) ayan..sarado na po 

Tatay: Pati yung TV anak..pakipatay na rin

Junior: (Hikab...inis...asar) ayan pinatay ko na...matutulog na'ko

Tatay: Ay teka saglit! patayin mo na rin yung ilaw

Junior: *&^*&%%#INA! KUNG SINONG GUSTONG KUMAN#@^%T...SIYANG MAGPATAY NG ILAW!!!

Delegates

In an international Convention of coffee-producing nations, the Philippines proved it really has given something to the coffee world. 

The Columbia delegate said: "We have the best coffee beans." 

Remarked the Japanese representative: "Japan refined coffee production to make people enjoy coffee more."

The American delegate: "America has the best and the most number of brands of regular and instant coffee, supported by the most modern means of production."

Then the Filipino delegate stood up to proudly declare: "The Philippines invented the two-hour coffee break!!!"

"Proud to be a Filipino."

Erap in library

"What time does the library open?" Erap on the

phone asked.

"Nine A.M. " came the reply. "And what's the idea

of calling me at home in the middle of the night

to ask a question like that?"

"Not until nine A.M.?" Erap asked in a disappointed

voice.

"No, not till nine A.M.!" the librarian said.

"Why do you want to get in before nine A.M.?"

"ha, who said I wanted to get in?" Erap sighed

sadly. "I want to get out!"